8 week 5 day ultrasound.

Baby is doing great and heartbeat is 158

9 weeks

This week has been a little rough. Morning sickness has kicked in and I've been on the couch all day. That's pretty much all that has been happening. Oh I may have felt the baby already. I was using my Doppler and I felt and heard a thump at the same time. This has happened a couple of times. I asked my Dr if it was possible and he said that it is but not typical. He said you just have to be very aware of your own body and I always have. I'm excited that I've made it this far into my pregnancy. After a loss later into your first trimester it's hard to relax. First trimesters are scary enough. 4 more weeks and I'll be in the 2nd trimester. 

8 weeks pregnant

8 weeks has been the week pregnancy sickness has kicked in full force. No throwing up but if I did I would get some relief. Being on the verge of losing my lunch or breakfast or anything that goes into my mouth is tough. But I'm grateful for the sickness cause it shows everything is going well. I listen to the baby daily and the kids love hearing it. Only 3 1/2 more weeks of taking progesterone and I'm really happy about that. Maybe my sickness will ease up. I'm still super tired and spend a lot of my day on the couch. At least I have the day to myself so I can rest and not push myself too much. I have an ultrasound this Friday so I'm excited to see the baby again.

7 weeks.

My sense of smell is really bothering me and I'm feeling a little more queasy. I had a horrible cold for 2 weeks and I'm trying to shake it the best I can. 

My bloat has leveled off. I think I'll look like this for a while until it's baby that is making my tummy this big. 

6 weeks 6 days ultrasound

I saw my little blob again today. It's heartbeat was 129 and growing right on track. 

6 weeks

Still tired and dizzy but I'm surprised that morning sickness hasn't hit hard. I bought maternity pants because I need them. It's so crazy how fast things change the more kids you have. I'm starting to use my Doppler just as an experiment. I wanted to see how early I could pickup the heartbeat. I found Mimi's at 9 weeks 6 days. We will see. 

5 weeks

This week I started to get really tired and dizzy after I took my progesterone. Other than that I've been craving steak so bad. I'm dreaming about steak. Maybe I need more iron. I'm so bloated this week it's crazy. 

4 weeks pregnant

4 week belly

I'm 4 weeks pregnant and it's been around 4 years ago that I had a pregnancy blog post. I feel so blessed that medical intervention has helped me on my way. I'm on progesterone so I have less anxiety about this pregnancy than if I were not on it. Being pregnant after a loss is really draining. I've had many chemical pregnancies but those happen mostly before you even know you are pregnant. I'm a early tester and if I wasn't I wouldn't even know about my chemicals. But since I had a loss after I saw a heart beat which brings the chances of miscarriage to 3%. It's still a very real possibility. I'm really tired and few other symptoms. I feel the round ligament stretching. I feel a little crampy so that makes me alittle worried about ectopic. I think I ovulated from my right side which is the side the dr had to redo and there is less tube there. I really think this is going to be a successful pregnancy. I just need to calm my nerves. 

Before surgery

First ultrasound

We got great news!!! The baby is in the uterus. We saw the yolk sac and fetal pole. The dr thought he saw a quick flicker for a second so I'm going back In a week for a follow up ultrasound. What a huge relief. Now just praying for normal development. The baby was measuring 5 weeks 6 days so that would make my due date Halloween. 

Is This Real.

I just had surgery a month ago. My cycles are super whacky. It's supposed to take a lot longer because I'm older. I am sooooo excited yet still anxious. I have the risk of a tubal because of the surgery. There are some hurtles to get past but at least I have progesterone to help sustain the pregnancy. I think I'm due early November. 

What are the chances.

My last cycle started 1/5 and my surgery was 1/22. I have longer cycles and thought I would ovulate around my surgery date. The morning of I got a ultrasound of my ovaries and it didn't look like I was even close to ovulating. I thought that I would ovulate during my recovery so no chance of conceiving that cycle. I started bleeding the day after my surgery and was told to expect it and it wasn't my period. I bled for 4 days and thought it was a lot more than I was told to expect. I was taking ovulation predictor tests to get an idea and after a while I got tired of taking then and stopped. My Drs policy is 2 weeks then you can try. I decided to take a OPK the day before my post op appointment which was 20 days after my surgery. I got a positive and thought it was interesting that my body would hold off that long to ovulate just in time for us to get the go ahead. 

Post Op appointment

I saw my dr and he gave the all clear. He told me it may take time to conceive considering I'm 35 now. We talked about the steps to take if I did get pregnant. I asked for progesterone in case just to be on the safe side. Once I left he told me to make him proud. We will see. 

Recovery

It was much harder than I thought it would be. I got allergies and every time I would sneeze my tubes would burn like crazy. It was hard to move around. Laughing would be painful. By 2 weeks post surgery I felt pretty good. I got lots of help and plenty of meals brought in. 

Surgery Day.

Surgery is always scary but I've never had my stomach cut open. It's like a mini c section but they don't cut open the uterus. I've never had a c section so I don't know what to expect. I got to the hospital and they brought me back to the operating room. I get a spinal (like an epidural) and some sleepy drugs. Next thing I know I'm being wheeled to my room. The pain wasn't so bad until later. They said my surgery went perfect and only lost 1 cm on my left tube and 2 cm on my right which is very good. I stayed the night and got to go home the next afternoon. Now time to recover. 

Intervention

Sometimes our lives go through twists and turns you would never expect. As I said before I am getting a reversal. I had lots of back and forth thoughts. 8 months ago I had a dream that I had this perfect little boy and I fell in love with him instantly. The dream was so real I felt the baby in my arms and everything was right. When I woke up I felt an emptiness in my heart. I really wanted to get the surgery but I didn't think it was possible. It's a elective surgery so insurance doesn't pay. Out of no where Jonathan got a job offer that would make affording the surgery more likely. After Jonathan got the job we moved and then the holidays hit. I had pushed my thoughts of getting the surgery done to the back burner. Miriam was now in full day and I had so much time to get my house in order. I was so excited to experience some sort of freedom. As the weeks went on felt lonely and that something was missing. Right before Christmas I had another vivid dream and I was in the hospital holding a brand new baby girl.   All of the sudden the nurse takes the baby from my arms and tells me I can't have her. I ask why not. She then says that I can't HAVE her and walks away. Suddenly I'm at my kitchen table filling out paper work and making phone calls trying to get my baby back. I woke up from my dream having a hard time catching my breath and crying. Felt that dream was telling me that I couldn't have that baby is because physically it was impossible. I would have to go through a process in order to have that baby. The next day I researched Drs and talked with Jonathan. Jonathan is 110% on board with this and seemed so relived that I was so serious about this. I researched so many Drs and made so many calls to find the right one. The dr I wanted was booked out until the beginning of April for surgery and this was the beginning of January. I scheduled my consultation for 1/7 and decided to look and see if any other dr had an opening that wasnt so far away. No one would call me back so I decided to stick with the Dr I already had an appointment with. We went up to the snow at the end of Christmas break and as we were coming down the mountain I got the distinct impression to call the dr and see if there was a cancelation. As soon as I got reception on my phone I called. The lady that makes the schedule answered the phone and guess what. They just had a cancelation and a spot opened up for a couple weeks later. Even though I didn't have my consultation yet I asked her to put my name on the schedule. Everything fell into place just perfectly. Sometimes plans change and we get a little help from the other side. I'm glad I acted upon the inspiration I received.  

Tubal Reversal

I decided to get my tubes reversed. I've been having symptoms of post tubal ligation syndrome. Like lightheaded and too many other that I'd rather not list. I'm excited to be able to feel normal again and if it's in heavenly fathers plan we will have another baby. 

Why might you ask. When I decided to tie my tubes I just found out that I lost 2 babies. I was devastated and made a choice that shouldn't have been allowed to make. Over the last 4 years I have regretted that choice and it has been very emotional. So after years of prayer and research we decided that the power of procreation is the Lords and we are not going to mess with that in the way we did. We think that it is an individual choice and there is no judgement coming from us. We are doing what's best for us. I'm excited for whatever is coming my way, whatever that may be.